the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
a search helicopter?!
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
