One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
