I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
