it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
