Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
only if we run a train.
done.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Randomize