ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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