dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Randomize
