Me. At least after what I've been through.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
