Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
