3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Randomize
