escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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