he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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