you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
Randomize
