I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
