Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Randomize
