me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
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