Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
