My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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