If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Randomize
