Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Just puked most of my soul out..
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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