I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
3 2 1 whiskey
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
