Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
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