i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
