I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Randomize
