Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
pop tarts are not kleenex
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Randomize
