i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Randomize
