Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Randomize
