My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
