I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize