I am in a vortex of obligation.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
