I think I am morally bankrupt
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
