hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
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