hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
