That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
