It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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