Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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