I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
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