I think I died a long time ago.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
