Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Randomize
