Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Randomize
