it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
