Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize
