He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
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