Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize