So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize