Plan B is the new Plan A
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
