I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
