OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
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