I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
