I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
is wine microwaveable?
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
